During the 2012 holiday season, a Charlotte resident Thomas Burgess was killed in an apartment fire. Police described Burgess as a hoarder and speculated that the amount of stuff in his apartment not only provided additional kindle for the electrical fire but may have kept him from making it out alive.
A tragedy such as this often makes us wonder if there is anything we could have done to help, make an impact, or change the outcome. Although we cannot go back or alter the past, we might be able to make changes in our own lives to prevent similar devastations or support other hoarders who need help.
1. Identify There Is a Hoarding Problem
The first step is to recognize when clutter has become excessive and a significant problem for ourselves or our loved ones. This is oftentimes difficult since acquiring and saving items can elicit positive feelings in the moment.
However, when looking at the bigger picture, it is often clear that hoarders are not living the life they want to be living. Instead, they have found themselves stuck in a hoarding cycle and do not know how to get out. The following points can be considered to help determine if clutter has become a problem:
- Excessive acquisition and/or failure to discard a large number of objects
- Difficulty financially, spatially, or organizationally handling the amount of items
- The clutter prevents or seriously limits the use of living spaces
- There are high risks including fire, falling, respiratory problems, or other health risks
- The clutter, acquiring, or difficulty discarding causes significant impairment, distress, or poor quality of life
2. Recognize the Consequences of Hoarding If No Changes Are Made
Oftentimes we tend to think of the reasons to keep all of our possessions rather than the reasons to make changes. However, hoarding can result in a variety of serious consequences:
- Difficulty finding important objects (keys, glasses, bills) creating more stress
- Unable to perform basic activities (cooking, bathing, sleeping)
- Inability to maintain and repair home
- Significant financial debt
- Relationship conflict or isolation
- Eviction or children removed from home
- Health risks, injury, fire hazard, or death
3. Remember You Are Not Alone
Hoarding has been estimated to occur in 5% of the population or 15 million people in the US. So there are many people out there who struggle with similar issues. There are also many researchers and mental health professionals that have focused on finding ways to help hoarding individuals.
So far, cognitive-behavioral therapy has shown to be the most effective treatment. Therapy can help to identify underlying beliefs and feelings related to hoarding, provide organizational and decision-making skills, and address any other issues such as anxiety, depression, or relationship problems.
4. Tips for Family and Friends of Hoarders
One of the most difficult things for us to accept is that the individual who is struggling with hoarding needs to make their own arguments for change. We cannot force, threaten, persuade, or shame them into it. We also cannot do it for them. So unless the clutter is immediately life-threatening, the best we can do is to offer support and empathy.
Instead of nagging or arguing, ask the individual how hoarding helps and hurts them, ask if their behaviors are consistent with their values and goals, and are they living the life they want to be living. You can also emphasize the importance of spending time together rather than focusing on physical items or enabling hoarding behaviors.
Lastly, share with the individual that help is out there. You can provide them with information about treatment as well as other resources such as professional organizers. Most importantly, we have to remember that change takes time and hoarding does not go away overnight.