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PARENTING POSTS ON PSYCH BYTES

“Understanding Consent” is a multi-part series exploring consent, sexual assault, and the conversation our nation is having around bodily autonomy and women.My middle school daughter recently shared an...
In this article, Dr. Frank Gaskill shares tips and tricks on how parents can teach children about money, regardless of their age. The article is broken down by age brackets.How to Teach...
When I write, I need to feel compelled to do so. I also think that my own worries about what others think of me affects my voice – if that makes sense.But then...
The Tween Attitude is Not UncommonIt’s not just you. When you look with shock, disappointment, disgust, anger (pick your own verb) at the pre-teen child standing before you, giving you the tween attitude.
Many parents are aware of the importance of having conversations with their kids about topics like sex, alcohol, and drugs or safe driving. Most of us find our way through these sometimes awkward but important conversations with...
Teachers may revel, and celebrate a change in their summer routine, and parents may have the opposite reaction.For many of us, myself included losing the structure of school involves coming up with other...
Controllers Down: How Parents Can Teach Frustration Tolerance Through Video GamesOne thing parents find frustrating with their kids and video games is that they can lose their temper.They might...
Do you find yourself constantly reminding, nagging, perhaps even pleading or threatening to get your child to listen, start, stop, or finish a simple task or routine behavior?How’s that working for you? Chances...
Here are some tips to stop saying no all the time to your children.Remember, changing your language and tone can make a difference in how you communicate with your children and how they...
How do you know when you are doing an excellent job as a parent, and more specifically, as a mom? How do you know that what you are doing is the best for your family?
Validate Your Child's Feelings and EmotionsValidation sometimes gets confused with agreement.You can validate your child without agreeing with their action.For example, I've had kids who...
Using Games to Teach Self-ControlI will never forget the first day when I picked my son up from daycare. He was just over 5 months old, and they had him sitting in a...
Child Is Missing School Due to IllnessWhen a child complains of physical symptoms in the morning before school it can be a tricky situation and difficult to know what to do. Are they...
What does it mean to be a family? Some exclude families to only parents and blood relatives. Others define families as people who you genuinely love, trust, and care about.In this episode of...
In a world obsessed with physical appearance, it may be tempting to believe that we as parents have very little control over how our children feel about their bodies.They (and let’s be...
Having a healthy relationship with food doesn’t always come naturally. Helping your child develop healthy habits at a young age can promote healthy eating for a lifetime, which can reduce their risk for a variety of disordered...
A little over a decade ago, I wrote Parenting the Millennial Generation. For a parenting book, it drew a decent amount of attention-getting mentioned six times in USA Today as well as in Newsweek and countless newspapers...
Having a child with ADHD can be tough. I’ve definitely struggled with who Gabe is over the years. As a baby, he would just lay on the floor surrounded by toys and not reach for a single...
One of the big complaints I get from parents in my practice is their kid's manners and how to teach them etiquette and proper table manners during dinner.I have a game that...
Let's talk about change and how it's cyclical.So, a lot of times parents wanna change their child's behavior or maybe you wanna change something about what you're doing specifically, like losing weight...
I love and enjoy what I do, I teach parents how to have difficult conversations with their children. Teaching them on how to keep the line of communication free and clear.However, in recent events I...
Parents of a special needs children may encounter myriad issues.  Some of the issues are expected such as the additional expense, mental and emotional drain, and day-to-day management of life.However, there is...
I recently spoke to a group of high school parents and administrators about the current substance use trends among teens. After the presentation, one of the school counselors brought out a box and dumped out its contents...
Here are some tips to get yourself out of the house in the morning and set up smooth routines for your children before school.5 Morning Routines for Parents
There are four things to keep in mind when dealing with an emotional child. This video will be talking about step number one.The first thing to keep in mind when dealing with an...
Today I'm going to teach you a game that helps with family relationships. It is called "Start, Stop, and Continue."This is how it works.Gather the entire family...
Give the Gift of Shared Experiences This Holiday Season I see a lot of clients over the holidays that have conflicting feelings about the holidays.Often times, they find gift giving to be shallow and insignificant. But research tells us that...
Focus on Gift Appreciation This Holiday Season Some ways to make the gift giving experience more pleasurable this holiday season is by focusing on appreciation.Do this by prepping kids ahead of time and talking about what gifts mean to them;...
I agreed to an Elf on the Shelf when I was in a particularly vulnerable time. My oldest was in kindergarten, and I had just gone back to work after maternity leave for baby number 3.He came home from...
How Can I Reward Positive Behavior? Let's talk about behavioral change at home. I do a lot of parent coaching and I talk about "grow the seeds, not the weeds."What that means is really highlight behaviors that you like...
"Dinner Time Is the Worse!" Meredith lamented when I asked her what was one of her most stressful times of her day as a parent. Meredith complained feeling like a drill Sergeant, constantly barking orders to her children to “sit...
How Can Parents Have a Successful School Year? Let's talk about having a successful school year! There are three things that you want to consider:1. Communicate back and forth between the school and yourself. You want to keep that communication...
Communication is not as simple, as we think. Most of us have a hard time with it. An assumption made is, once a child can speak, they are now able to communicate.  That is not the case.
What Should You Do If You Don’t Like Your Child’s Friend?Your child has finally found another kid that they connect with, they have hours of playdate or get-together, and rarely anything terrible happens....
Keep Reading to Your Child Many parents have asked me when they should stop reading to their child. And my answer is... NEVER!Of course, children should learn to read independently. But share reading has many benefits, even for kids who...
How Idioms Can Help With Reading One of the most significant challenges for students is reading between the lines of a story, novel, or poem.They have to interpret symbolic language, which is like code words that an author or poet...
What to Expect in Sibling Support Groups A really cool thing about my job is I get to do sibling support groups. And in my groups, we get to talk about a couple of different things.One of those things is...
How Can I Validate My Child's Emotions? Let's talk about preventing emotional outbursts at home.So, I'm betting if you're interested in this video, you've got a middle-schooler or a high-schooler at home.You might find yourself trying to have conversations with...
A Parent's Guide to Boxing I have never actually watched a boxing match, so please excuse me if my terminology is a bit off in this article. And, to be clear, no punches were actually exchanged, this is all just...
When I work with families, I like to view them as a small business. Family is a business that has a top-down culture, meaning the founders of the business have the majority say in its values and missions, but...
Maintaining Your Parenting Sanity Year-Round Involve children in discussions about rules and routines. Give specific instructions. Keep it short and straightforward.Keep activities in small increments that can be managed independently.Be consistent! Children thrive on consistency.Assign tasks that your child is...
School resuming session can be a stressful transition. Most of us have a hard time figuring out how to have a successful year and how to execute those things. Here are 10 easy-to-follow guidelines that will help your family...
Kids are heading back-to-school! Beach plans are coming to an end, sleeping in and relaxed mornings are over. Majority of parents and caretakers are excited to see their children back into a routine and out of the house.However, the...
Co-Sleeping with a Preschooler What is your opinion on co-sleeping with a preschooler?My first job in sleep was working on a SIDS research study. We performed sleep studies on infants and would mimic their standard sleep conditions.The infants who co-slept...
Love Your Children by Loving Your Partner Hi, I'm Dr. Frank Gaskill, and I'm here to talk to you about couples therapy. When you're dealing with partners in relationships, you end up having difficulties.We're humans, we make mistakes. Couples therapy...
As a father to three sons, I have embarked on a mission to impart in them life lessons of the utmost importance. These are my stories.  Life Lesson #66- Journaling Important Experiences It was an epic weekend. We were in the...
How to Cultivate a Positive and Healthy Relationship with Your Child 1. Properly Communicate Teach your child how to express their needs and to advocate through proper communication.  2. Be Responsible Children need to learn how to do things for themselves.  3. Problem...
How to Improve Reading Comprehension  It can be really hard for students to interpret symbolic language, or code words that an author or poet uses to convey important messages.Literature intended for younger children can help with this.It makes word decoding...
I first need to acknowledge that I am a huge Harry Potter fan. Why then, you might ask, did I not include Harry Potter in my list of favorite children’s books? That’s because I consider J.K. Rowling’s opus to...
What NOT to Say When Talking to Your Teen About Marijuana Here is a list of conversation killers to avoid when talking to your teen about marijuana.1. Avoid making it one, all-or-nothing conversation. Be open to ongoing conversations. This can...
How Many Times a Day Do You Say NO to Your Kids? For many parents, it often feels that all they say is “No.” Saying “no” all the time sets a negative tone for parent-child interactions, and makes many parents feel...
As a father to three sons, I have embarked on a mission to impart in them life lessons of the utmost importance. These are my stories. Life Lesson #20- How to Navigate the Subway System of a Major City We had...
Going back to school can be stressful for the whole family. Summer provides a needed break for everyone, however, with the lack of structure, it can wreak havoc when it comes back to returning to school.The summer schedule and...
Sleep Changes vs. Depression or Anxiety in Adolescence Our sleep needs remain pretty high through childhood and adolescence, which gets more and more challenging when adolescence arrives.There are some changes to sleep patterns that are associated with development in adolescence.Most...
Being Bored is Good for Kids: What to Do When Your Children Are Bored If you're a parent, I can guarantee you've heard your kids say, "I'm bored. I don't know what to do."Well, the idea of being bored is...
Why Is My Child Struggling with Sleep? There are several characteristics in people that can make them more vulnerable to struggles with sleep.People who have insomnia have a predisposition to developing these sleep struggles.1. They have more challenges when there...
What to Say When Discussing Marijuana with Teens More than one in five parents of teens believe that what they say has little influence on whether their child will use drugs or alcohol.Teens report their parents' beliefs around drugs and...
How to Co-Parent Cohesively Cohesive Parenting while divorced can be challenging. However, you can be unified in your parenting after you are divorced.What is co-parenting?Co-Parenting is when two people can put their difference aside and come to an agreement of...
Using Fortnite as a Parenting Tool Hi, I’m Dr. Frank Gaskill, and I’m here to talk to you about parenting and Fortnite.I use Fortnite as a way to communicate with my kids and gaming in general as a nice way...
Teaching Independence Without Helicopter Parenting Julie Lythcott Haims, former Dean of Freshmen at Stanford University, wrote a book about the perils of helicopter parenting called "How to Raise an Adult".To summarize, she and her colleagues at other colleges were finding...
Appropriate Behaviors for a One-Year-Old While every child is different and there are no hard-and-fast rules about when certain developmental milestones occur, there are general timelines for when we expect to see certain accomplishments.Relatedly, some children may be advanced in...
We are in the final week of school, which means that I am in the final countdown for making lunches, keeping laundry on schedule, and signing agendas.For my adolescent, I don’t have nearly as much hands-on parenting, but the...
What Is the Ideal Bedtime for a Child? What is the ideal bedtime for a child who has to wake at 7 AM and how much does going off schedule at breaks affect them?The way to understand the ideal bedtime...
How Can I Help My Teen Grow Up? If parents want to help launch their teens into adulthood, start by not doing the following three things:1. STOP Doing Things They Can Do for ThemselvesParents, if you do everything for your...
What Are The 10 Main Intuitive Eating Principles? The 10 main intuitive eating principles are:1. Reject the diet mentality. This idea that there's got to be some diet that will work for you - often with lots of unreasonable rule.2....
More and more we are hearing about suicide among teens and young adults. We hear about the rising suicide rates in the news, how suicide is the second leading cause of death for youth ages 10-24, and we hear...
What Makes for a Good Social Skills Group? Much of what I do in my job include social skills groups and that is the primary form of treatment for people on the spectrum.Those on the spectrum need these skills to...
Helicopter Parenting vs Authoritative Parenting Diana Baumrind, in her research at the University of California, identified the authoritative parenting style.The authoritative parenting style is warm but firm. Parents have high expectations, but also provide high support.This authoritative parenting style is...
As a father to three sons, I have embarked on a mission to impart in them life lessons of the utmost importance. These are my stories.  Life Lesson #14- How to Play a Musical Instrument Groundhog Day is one of my...
Why Are Today's Teens Anxious? Anxiety is a familiar experience for today's teenagers. The weight of school work and pressure to perform at increasingly higher standards seems unrelenting.Teens report little relief from anxiety even after major tasks are accomplished, and...
How to Help Kids with Sleepover Anxiety There are many challenges that kids can face when invited to a sleepover.From the perspective of sleep, they will have to face sleeping in a foreign environment, which will disrupt a lot of...
Helping ADHD Students Read Actively Students with ADHD often slip into what I call "auto-pilot mode" when reading, meaning that they're decoding every word, but their mind is someplace else.They get to the bottom of the page and realize they...
Does My Failure to Launch Kid Need Therapy? Parents and young-adult children can bring about positive change without therapy or outside help if:1. The young adult wants to change2. The young adult is open to collaboration and feedback3. If the...
How Can I Help My Anxious Teen? To help your teen cope with a stressful situation, avoid jumping into fix-it mode.First, validate your teen's concerns and perspective.You could say, "That sounds like a tough spot," or, "I can see why...
What Is a Helicopter Parent? Dr. Haim Ginott first referenced this term in 1969 in his book Between Parent and Teenager. He was referring to a statement made by a teen that his mother was hovering like a helicopter.In the...
As a father to three sons, I have embarked on a mission to impart in them life lessons of the utmost importance. These are my stories. Life Lesson #44- How to Downhill Ski The Southern Comfort lift at Big Sky is...
How Do I Talk About Marijuana with My Teen? Here are a few tips to try and stick to when starting up a dialogue about marijuana.1. Create an optimal time and environment. If your teen has done nothing wrong, nothing...
Enhance Your Child's Social Skill Development: The 5 P's Purpose of Social Situations: Explain the Why Learning the reasons behind social situations is more effective than rote memorization of a list of skills. Memorizing certain behavior responses or scripts is a...
Conquering Your Kid's Nighttime Fears The challenge with nighttime fears is that they can feel really irrational to parents, but are absolutely real to kids. The best way to handle this to start with trying to understand them the best...
What is one of your favorite childhood memories? Imagine back as far as you can to the clearest joyful image from when you were young.If you are like most of the parents I ask in my workshops and...
Giving Instructions to Kids with ADHD Keisha has a 10-year-old daughter with ADHD who is driving her crazy because she doesn't pay attention to instructions at home. Here are some tips!First, ask her for some sort of signal that she's...
As a father to three sons, I have embarked on a mission to impart in them life lessons of the utmost importance. These are my stories. Life Lesson #72- Making a Kick-Butt Grilled Cheese What a different and tragically less wonderful...
How Can I Cultivate Healthy Sleep Habits in My Child? There are several ways that parents can play a role in cultivating healthy sleep habits in their kids.The biggest factor is to treat sleep as a priority and protect the...
Helping ADHD Students Listen Actively During a lecture or presentation students with ADHD are at risk for zoning out and missing information.The key is being an active listener and there are a few ways to accomplish this. Set up notes...
The Difficulty of Money As a child psychologist, my clients will often ask me, “How much money is appropriate for my 10-year-old when I give them an allowance?” A typical rule of thumb is to provide a dollar for every...
Got Conflict? “I used to hold on to this belief that I had to win every battle with my daughter. That I am the boss and my daughter should do what I say without question. But the truth is, it...
We’ve all heard our friends make comments about what they “shouldn’t” have eaten that night out at the restaurant. Or perhaps you yourself have commented about needing to get to the gym to make up for a meal or...
As a father to three sons, I have embarked on a mission to impart in them life lessons of the utmost importance. These are my stories. Life Lesson #41- The Lewis and Clark Expedition On August 12, 1805, Captain Meriwether Lewis...
Are Video Games Making Kids Violent? One of the things that I've been running into a lot lately is parents' concerns about technology and violence in video games creating aggression in kids. And what I want to explain here is...
How to Be an E-Parent ©2002 Technology is pretty scary to parents. Kids typically know more than they do and the screens seem to be stealing our kids away. Parents typically don’t know what to do. In response to their...
We have a big birthday coming up this summer in the Daley house, and have decided to celebrate it through a big family vacation. As we have been working to plan our trip, I have been reminded of one...
How Do I Find a Good Therapist for My Kid Who's on the Spectrum? Honestly, it's really tough to navigate and know when a psychology or therapist understands the spectrum.Any good therapist will welcome a five or ten-minute interview or...
As a father to three sons, I have embarked on a mission to impart in them life lessons of the utmost importance. These are my stories.  Life Lesson #73- Feminism In the 2016 U.S. Presidential election, Hilary Clinton cracked, but did...
We are regularly inundated with different fragments of information on how to nurture our children. Parents want to make sure that we are doing the most excellent job that we can because we love our children. We want to...
What are your hopes for your teen this year? A fresh year brings the excitement of new milestones and uncertainty of what challenges may tag along.Maybe you are anticipating the start of high school, a driver’s license, a first...
Backward Planning for Students with ADHD Is your child with ADHD scattered when it comes to long-term assignments? This is a very common problem with ADHD which can hinder organization.A great way to improve this is backward planning! 3 Steps to...
Marshmallow Experiment by Walter MischelFifty years ago at Stanford University’s Bing Nursery School, psychologist Walter Mischel began what would become one of the most famous psychological experiments of all time.He brought preschoolers...
As a father to three sons, I have embarked on a mission to impart in them life lessons of the utmost importance. These are my stories. For more parenting tips and tricks, check out our book "Southeast Psych's Guide...
Around Halloween this year, my daughters (ages 4 and 9) started asking about baking Christmas cookies together! While this may be off-season, my daughters were ready to start planning our “Girls Cookie Baking Day.”Each year we spend one day...
What's the Difference Between Discipline and Punishment? Discipline is good. It is a guide with limitations and expectations while teaching what is appropriate. It is okay. There is nothing wrong with disciplining your child. Having boundaries is a good thing.Discipline...